A young mother’s work is never done: Feed the baby, change the baby, wash the dishes, sweep the floor, cook dinner… There’s nothing worse than filling the dishwasher twice in one day only to find that there are still dishes left in the sink!
When my son was born, I found myself working in circles every day of the week, resenting the fact that I never get a day off—not a holiday or a weekend or a sick day. I cringed when I heard my husband say, “Oh, good, it’s Friday. We get to sleep in tomorrow.” To which I always replied, “No, Sweetheart, I won’t be sleeping tomorrow. I never get to sleep in!”
One day, I decided something must be done about that. I needed a sabbath, just like everyone else.
A sabbath is a day of rest. It was established in the Old Testament through God’s Law that was given to Moses. The order to take a sabbath was one of the Ten Commandments (Exodus 20:8), right alongside “Thou shall not murder,” and “Thou shall not commit adultery.” If God thought it was important enough to establish this for His people, shouldn’t I think it’s important in my life, as well?
But how can a mother take a day off? True, some things can’t be overlooked, like the needs of the baby. But there are some things that didn’t have to maintain every day. As I evaluated my regular weekly tasks, I discovered some ways to loosen up my weekends and make room for a little fun and relaxation.
Here are the three rules I established to find my personal rest. Maybe you need them, too:
- No housework on the weekends. No dishes, no laundry, no putting things away. I gave myself permission not to feel guilty about a dirty house, and I used that time to catch up on my hobbies or just relax in front of the TV.
- Cook as little as possible. Now, perhaps your hobby is cooking, and if that’s the case, feel free to kick it up a notch with a five-course meal. I, however, see it as a chore. So I asked my husband if we can scrape up a few extra bucks on the weekends for take-out. On one income, it wasn’t always possible to eat out, and in those cases, I prepared the easiest meal I could find—chicken nuggets and hotdogs, anyone? Or there was always the possibility of “Leftover Smorgasbord” from the previous week’s dinners. The women in the Old Testament were instructed to prepare their meals the night before the sabbath. Whatever the case, the goal is simplicity.
- Take time to do things I enjoy. During my sabbaths, I often sat back with some hot tea and enjoyed a good movie with my husband without that nagging feeling that I didn’t get such-n-such done that day. It allowed me to actually relax. I could finally stop saying, “If I ever get an extra minute …” and start saying, “I’ll get to that on Saturday when I take my sabbath.”
I still had to change dirty diapers and nurse my baby, and I still didn’t get to sleep in, but these few changes gave me a better attitude and something to look forward to each weekend.
If you’re a mom in this stage of life, just remember that the days are long, but the years are short. Giving yourself permission to relax will help you endure the weeks in between.