Being that my husband and I were both first-born, type-A personalities, there was little doubt in our minds regarding whether or not we would find out the gender of our first baby. We most definitely wanted to know, not just because it made for easy decorating, but because we just couldn’t wait to find out!
If you had asked me what I thought my baby was going to be, I would have told you a girl. I just “knew” I was having a girl. I dreamed about it; others felt it, too. Almost everyone thought I was having a girl.
So when I found out it was a boy, I needed time for it to sink in. Suddenly, I went from dreaming about ballerinas and baby dolls to discussing little league baseball and fishing trips.
If I had gone on gut instinct, our son would have ended up with a pink nursery because I was not going to paint after he was born. But the color of the nursery wasn’t the only benefit of knowing the baby’s sex. By knowing the gender, we were able to bond with our son in many ways, and we were able to bond as mommy and daddy, too.
My Three Benefits
Not everyone wants to know the gender of their baby, and that’s okay. But If you’re open to the possibility of finding out early, here are some benefits.
First, knowing the sex of the baby helped me bond with him. Before I knew we were having a boy, it was hard to refrain from calling the baby “it.” Using such a non-descript term for a person bothered me, but the lack of knowing made it very difficult to communicate about baby without calling him “it.” I tried names like “baby” or “our little one,” but it all seemed very awkward.
When I found out our baby was a boy, I not only had the honor of saying “my son,” but I could also call him by name—Benjamin. The experts say that babies can hear their mother’s voice in the womb. Some even believe babies have already begun to learn their mother’s native language. How precious to know my son already heard me calling him by name.
Second, we were able to pray for our child by name. God already had a plan for our son even in the womb. God Himself is the One who wove our little boy together for a specific purpose in life (Psalm 149). By knowing our son’s name, we got to be a part of that process by praying for Benjamin every day. And he wasn’t just “baby” or “little bundle.” He was Benjamin Robert Beasley (McDonald)—the same man who will one day carry out God’s call on his life.
Third, we knew how to focus our reading and study. New parents have very little time for anything other than baby—that includes quiet times, Christian parenting books, and even attending church during the first few weeks.
By knowing we were having a boy, it helped me focus. God made boys and girls different, and I wanted to know how to raise my son the best I can according to God’s word—not just how to raise him as a person, but as a man.
These three concepts were valuable to me. I know many people feel strongly about leaving the gender unknown or that it’s more exciting to let the unknown linger. Obviously, it’s a personal choice with no right or wrong answers. And it’s easy to adapt these same benefits to your relationship with your unborn child, whether you know the gender or not. But for us, knowing the gender became an exciting part of building our legacy.